~ 5 Weeks Postpartum~

(I love this picture I saw on the internet)

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As I looked in the mirror before my son was born I saw a huge (what appeared to be a beach ball) stomach. I felt kicks and elbows, flutters, and hiccups. It was amazing! A tiny person was growing inside of me. How wonderful.

Fast forward five weeks- As I look in the mirror I see a soft stomach (that 9 months+ ago I thought was firm). I see dark spots that came out of no where. I also see red lines that run vertically down my stomach (that I did not see while I was pregnant)- I met the one thing I thought I had prevented.. stretch marks.

My first human/womanly thought was: " Will they go away? Will they lighten up? Will my husband still find me attractive if they stay?" I get comments from people like "You look great for just having a baby!" and while I am grateful for the compliments- people have no clue what it looks like under the shirt that I am wearing.

While I was thinking about this change that my body is having to adapt to I ran across this blog that hit me like a ton of bricks!- http://www.abeautifulbodyproject.com/_babies_ruin_bodies_an_ode_to_my_postpartum_body#.UtcBf-l3s

I prayed for this baby to come into my life and I am so grateful that he is here! I was quickly reminded of the struggle that we went through to have him (and the struggles that many women are going through to get pregnant- or even those who have faced the fact that they can't have children!).

Psalms 139:13-14 says:
For you created my inmost being;
    you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
    your works are wonderful,
    I know that full well.

Although I am slowly looking at my body in a new way- it is still a struggle- I am just being real with you! Not because of what I think- but because society tells us that stretch marks and flabby skin are ugly. But this is a struggle that I will gladly take.

God knit him together piece by piece inside of me. I am blessed that God chose me to be his mother! God knew how big he would be an how small I was while he was forming- because he was fearfully and wonderfully made. Each and every stretch mark is worth it because it carried the child that God created! I can honestly say that with every look at a stretch mark I think of him hiccupping inside of me or kicking me and it makes me smile because every mark tells a story. Will it take time to get used to this new body- or try to improve it- certainly! But I have time.. Trying to see what I thought was a struggle- now as a blessing!

 I once heard "For every woman that is unhappy with her postpartum marks- there is another who wishes she had them!" trying to remember that "My body isn't ruined- I am just a tiger who has earned her stripes!"


Whether it be stretch marks- or something else unrelated to babies--- try to think of your struggles in a positive light- it does the soul good!