~Adoption~

Before Andrew and I found out we were expecting- while we were struggling- we read and read about adoption. We prayed and prayed about adoption-- we even researched adoption agencies!  We read the book 'Orphanology' by Tony Merida and David Platt --- WOW--- God had laid it on our hearts that if we couldn't conceive then we would just adopt. The bible and the book we read really brought it to our attention that WE WERE ALL ADOPTED by God! God adopted us into his family! We were lost and he opened up his arms and took us in. We should do the same thing!

Romans 8:14-16  explains just how we were adopted by God.

For all who are led by the Spirit of God are children of God. So you have not received a spirit that makes you fearful slaves. Instead, you received God's Spirit when he adopted you as his own children. Now we call him, "Abba, Father. "For his Spirit joins with our spirit to affirm that we are God's children.


How awesome is that!

The Bible also tells us in
 
Psalm 68:5-6 -
Father to the fatherless, defender of widows-
this is God, whose dwelling is holy.
God places the lonely in families;
he sets the prisoners free and gives them joy.
But he makes the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land.


And when it comes to welcoming a new child in it states:
Matthew 18:5 
"And anyone who welcomes a little child like this on my behalf is welcoming me.

Adoption, I feel, comes straight from God. It takes special people to be able to open up their homes and hearts to love another like their own. We are told by God to do so.. SO why do we waiver when it comes to the topic? I know that God has placed adoption on our hearts for a reason. I firmly believe that in the future God will provide for us to adopt a child one day. I can't wait to see what God has in store for our little family! I highly recommend the book Orphanology to anyone contemplating adoption. It thoroughly relates how adoption is directly related in the gospel.. Such a great read!

Boy or Girl???

For a second- I thought it would be cool to not know if it was a boy or girl... But Andrew- HAD TO KNOW! So at 17 weeks we went to our Dr.'s appointment hoping they would tell us the sex of our little one. Immediately the Doctor knew! We both looked at each other as the doc told us! Tears filled our eyes! We would have been happy either way but knowing made it more real. Again.... we couldn't wait to share the news. This was totally Andrews Idea and I loved it!

IT'S A BOY!!!!!!!!

 

 

Our Due date is Christmas Eve! When the doctors told us that at 6 weeks we were in shock. My first thought was "The greatest Gift God ever gave this world was on Christmas"... Here we were not knowing how long it would take to have a baby and God was giving us one for Christmas!

 

As I stated before... God's timing is everything!  As Christmas is quickly approaching- I can't help but think about how I haven't done all my Christmas shopping this year... (My human instinct is that it doesn't feel like Christmas unless I have presents to put under the tree!) But God is reminding me this Christmas season that the true meaning of Christmas is CHRIST and the gift he gave to this dying world!.. My whole family is remembering this all over again. We have always known- yet we are being refreshed this Holiday season!  

 

Last year I tried to do 25 random acts of kindness in December. This was truly amazing! I paid for the car behind me in the drive thru (I gave a note to the cashier to give them) it said " This month I am trying to do 25 random acts of kindness because God made the ultimate act of kindness when He gave Jesus to this lost and dying world.. Merry CHRISTmas.. Please pay it forward).. I encourage you to remember the true meaning of the season this year.. Don't get caught up in shopping so much that you lose sight of the Holiday. Make your children give a toy to a child who needs one...teach them that it is good to give... not just to receive. ..  Donate some items or some food items to a pantry. GIVE- because God first Gave to us!

~Telling the World~

Because of what we had gone through- we decided that we would wait to tell the world that we were expecting. (HARD SECRET TO KEEP WHEN YOU ARE BUSTING FROM WITHIN)..

We did in fact tell our parents, family and best friends when we found out! Of course they were so excited for us and just as shocked as we were. As for the rest of the world- they found out at 12 weeks... One of my favorite verses in the bible now is 1st Samuel 1:27- "For this child I have prayed and God has granted me the desires of my heart"... I wanted to use this while announcing to the world that we were having a baby- because I know that this was a God thing! This baby was truly our gift from God! How could I not acknowledge that!?!?!

I stated in a past blog that through this whole experience I noticed my prayer life changing. That is a TRUE statement! I use to pray for Gods protection over my family and friends and for tedious things I thought were important. I once heard a song and a preacher say that God doesn't just want you to ask for things all the time! He wants you to talk to him as if he is your best friend! Thank him for what he is doing in your life!  My prayers quickly changed. I was no longer starting my prayers with "Dear Lord, Please...." I was starting with "Dear Lord, Thank you for...." On the way to work and on the way home were my prayer times with God. I would quickly jump in the car- turn OFF the radio and pray! Sometimes I would get all the way to work and realize that the radio was still off. I caught myself thanking God for EVERYTHING and EVERYONE that he had placed in my life... for blessing me and loving me when I didn't deserve it. I would then put my problems in his hands and ask for his help with me not holding on to them. Wow-- what a great feeling!  Starting this routine is something I don't think would have happened if we hadn't gone through what we had.

(I know there are many who have it way worse- I know there are people who have struggled with all sorts of issues larger than I can imagine.. Yet- I feel like my struggle can help someone see theirs in a new perspective)

 

Seeing Baby for the First Time~ 6 Weeks

Talk about crazy emotions! Tears began flowing as the Doctors said "See Mom and Dad, there is your baby!!!" Who would have known that something that looked like a boiled peanut to a Southern Girl would have such a huge impact. Andrew and I both sat in amazement. God surely did Bless us! That is simply what it was a BLESSING FROM GOD! The nickname "Peanut" took off.

This is such a great reminder that in Matthew 19:26 it is stated that "..With God all things are possible"... No matter what one is going through- we should never lose sight of this verse. Even when the odds were against us- the Doctors weren't very encouraging- or the Devil and the world were whispering in our ear.... we stayed focused on the fact that we serve a Mighty God.

Before all this happened I would listen to a few songs over and over-- One of them was "You are for me" by Kari Jobe. Here are a few of the lyrics:

 

 So faithful
So constant
So loving and so true
So powerful in all You do

You fill me
You see me
You know my every move
You love for me to sing to You

I know that You are for me
I know that You are for me
I know that You will never
Forsake me in my weakness

And I know that You have come now
Even if to write upon my heart
To remind me who You are

 



 



 

I love the end of the chorus... "To remind me who you are".. Sometimes I think we forget. We forget to BE STILL and KNOW THAT HE IS GOD! There are so many daily reminders yet we overlook them! Challenge for today: Everywhere you look be reminded.... 

 

 

 

 

 

~How I told Andrew~

Well since it was a Saturday I had someone call me in a BLOOD test.. Andrew has always said " I don't want to know until its on paper and you are 100%!" So I went and had my blood drawn and sat there and waited what seemed like forever! Once the Lab tech came out and said Congrats... I HUGGED HER! Yes, I did!! I am not lying about that!

We were supposed to eat dinner with my parents so I tried to rush them through eating.. I also rushed through cleaning the kitchen so we could go home!

Upon getting home Andrew jumped in the shower- I then started his Scavenger hunt. 
When he got out of the shower I handed him a note- which had a little riddle that led him to the refrigerator... In the refrigerator he found a Reece's with a Note that said "I thought I was just addicted to them but I don't think that I am... Look beside your bed to find out why"...

He was then led to a table on his side of the bed. There was another note that explained to him that I thought I knew how much I loved him... He had been my childhood best friend, my next door neighbor, my boyfriend and my husband.. but Today God showed me that I could love him more.. because he was going to be my child's Father... Under his note was the 3 test I had taken.. and the blood results of course!  

Talk about a man falling to pieces! Our hearts were humbled that God had provided for the need that we had been praying for! He didn't say no.. he was telling us to wait!

Waiting is the hardest thing that I think we had experienced. Seeing so many around you having children so fast and easy was hard. While being happy for them you catch yourself being bitter inside.... -- I kept trying to remember a quote I heard from Pastor Perry Noble.. He said "If we focus on our Circumstances... They get bigger... But if we turn our focus on Jesus.. our Circumstances get smaller"...

That is my advice when it comes to waiting--- focus on the big picture: Jesus! He had a plan- that was bigger than what we could ever imagine!

Bracelet I had made to remind me that I needed to pray more... and worry less!!! God can handle things on his own.. he doesn't need my help!  Phil 4:6 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with Thanksgiving present your requests to God".

~Our Baby Testimony~

Our struggles with my health came in May of 2011. I was having horrible headaches where I could feel my heart beating in my ears. My Mom took my blood pressure at home on her machine and it was extremely high (165/100) we thought there might be an error in her machine so I went to sleep. Sleep, or laying down, was the only thing that made it feel any better.

The next day before work I went across the street to the Beaufort Fire Department. I asked the gentleman that was cleaning the fire truck if he would check my blood pressure to get my Mom off my back about it. He proceeded to do so and was shocked. My blood pressure on his machine registered at 195/105.. He thought his machine was broke as well so he tried it again on my other arm (185/100). He immediately told me that I needed to go to the hospital and that he would drive me. You know me, stubborn and independent, I drove myself!

Doctors started me on high blood pressure medicine and sat in awe on how a 23 year old would have such issues. We wouldn't discover until later on that I had Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. I was one of that rare percentage of women that show no outward signs of PCOS. In February 2012 Andrew and I decided that we would start our journey of trying to start a family. Shortly after we discovered that my Female Cycles weren't like other females. The average female ovulates every 28 days that means at least 12 times a year. My cycles weren't until every 55-85 days and they couldn't guarantee that I was ovulating at all! This was going to be an issues with starting a family.

Andrew and I prayed about it and continued to see the Doctor. I was prescribed some other medications to help with the situation but my biggest issue was taking it all personal. As a female, I longed to have children one day. It was hard to come to terms that it was my body that was preventing that from happening. Prayer is something that was continuous in my life but I noticed my prayer life changing, for the better, through all of this!

I went back 3 months later and met with the Doctor. She did blood work and all kinds of other tests and basically told me that my chances of having children were about 20%. I kept it together until I got to the car. Then I lost it! 20% out of 100%.. Wow. Once again taking it personal.

Word of God Speak

Sunday mornings at church were hard for me especially when I take every sermon as if the Preacher is speaking right to me. This particular Sunday I believe that God intended the message be for me. The sermon was on Elizabeth (Mary's Cousin). Elizabeth was an older woman who had wanted children. She was told that she was unable to have children. This is what the Bible says in Luke:


²⁶ In the sixth month of Elizabeth’s pregnancy, God sent the angel Gabriel to Nazareth, a town in Galilee, ²⁷ to a virgin pledged to be married to a man named Joseph, a descendant of David. The virgin’s name was Mary. ²⁸ The angel went to her and said, “Greetings, you who are highly favored! The Lord is with you.”
²⁹ Mary was greatly troubled at his words and wondered what kind of greeting this might be. ³⁰ But the angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary; you have found favor with God. ³¹ You will conceive and give birth to a son, and you are to call him Jesus. ³² He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, ³³ and he will reign over Jacob’s descendants forever; his kingdom will never end.”
³⁴ “How will this be,” Mary asked the angel, “since I am a virgin?”
³⁵ The angel answered, “The Holy Spirit will come on you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the holy one to be born will be called^[b] the Son of God. ³⁶ Even Elizabeth your relative is going to have a child in her old age, and she who was said to be unable to conceive is in her sixth month. ³⁷ For no word from God will ever fail.”
³⁸ “I am the Lord’s servant,” Mary answered. “May your word to me be fulfilled.” Then the angel left her.

Mary Visits Elizabeth

³⁹ At that time Mary got ready and hurried to a town in the hill country of Judea, ⁴⁰ where she entered Zechariah’s home and greeted Elizabeth. ⁴¹ When Elizabeth heard Mary’s greeting, the baby leaped in her womb, and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit. ⁴² In a loud voice she exclaimed: “Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the child you will bear! ⁴³ But why am I so favored, that the mother of my Lord should come to me? ⁴⁴ As soon as the sound of your greeting reached my ears, the baby in my womb leaped for joy. ⁴⁵ Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill his promises to her!” (Biblegateway.com)

- Wow, "Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill his promises to her!" I feel like the key word in this is BELIEVED. So often I would give my problems to God. But when I got done praying, sitting through a sermon, or kneeling at the alter- I would pick them right back up and take them with me.

That sermon hit me like a ton of bricks. Why was I holding on to all of these problems? Why was I thinking I could handle them and God couldn't? So I prayed and prayed and prayed! Then I recalled a line from a sermon I heard at work (while I work I sometimes listen to New Spring- Perry Noble)... He said " The Circumstances that are Over Your Head... are still Under His Feet!!" Talk about getting slapped in the face by the God.

We went back to the Doctor and Nothing had changed. I told Andrew I feel like we need to see someone who specializes in this sort of thing. Being the supportive husband that he is, Andrew agreed. I then called Coastal Fertility Specialist in Mount Pleasant. My waiting months between Doctors appointments was now over! They immediately made me an appointment and we went for a consultation.

Coastal Fertility Specialist

Upon meeting with the specialist and after they reviewed my charts and did some tests of their own- they agreed that it was in fact my body that was being complicated. They told me that I most likely wasn't ovulating and had a 2% chance each month where as most women have a 20% chance. Ouch- my odds were against me.. But I knew God was for me! I have a faith that can move mountains yet I am still human! I worry, I doubt, I cry just like the rest of the world. We talked about a plan with the doctors and how we would most likely have to try an IUI or IVF after that if the IUI was unsuccessful.
Hearing that made us cringe because we knew that what came with the IUI or the IVF was a hefty price tag. Money is not a deal breaker but we knew that we were going to not only have to be emotionally, physically, and mentally prepared.. but also financially prepared! We knew that God would provide so we kept on with the testing.
On April 1st 2013 I went in for an HSG- an HSG is where they inject a dye into your body and watch it travel through your female organs. Talk about painful! The only thing they tell you before you come is to eat so you don't pass out.. and make sure you take some Motrin. The test hurt really bad but only lasted like 5 minutes. They said since it was so painful it could have pushed some mucus or blockages out of the way. We then talked about the medications that I was being prescribed. Some were pills others were going to be shots. The doctor told us to wait until I started another cycle and then come in and they would show me how to administer the shots etc.

 

April 27,2013

I woke up on a typical Saturday and got busy with my plans. After returning home about Mid day I realized that I was bloated, my breast were hurting, and I couldn't stop craving Reese Cups!  I had a pregnancy test in the drawer and looked at it as I walked by. I thought to myself "Nah, The odds were against me.. I would just be wasting a test" but the more I walked by it the more I was curious. So I finally broke down and took it. I walked a way for a few minutes to do something and when I came back- I was in SHOCK! I immediately fell on the bed sobbing in tears. All I can remember saying OUTLOUD was THANK YOU JESUS!!!!!  Our lives as we knew it were about to change.. and it was all a GOD thing! Talk about Answering prayers--- I am a firm believer that God answers all prayers.. Some are Yes, Some are NO.. and some are wait.... God's timing is everything!